Who and Who With?

You! Anyone with a curious and adventuresome spirit, an open mind and a reasonable level of health can travel. I have shared a Norwegian youth-hostel dormitory room on the shores of the North Sea with a duo of sixty-plus Australian women, and I have traded mountain trail in Eastern Nepal with an American woman and her 14-month old infant. Where there is a will, there is a way.

Differences in cultures around the world should prompt potential travellers to consider how their gender, age and race might be regarded in the destinations they choose to visit.

Who Do I Go With?

Give careful consideration to this choice, its consequences could be a little trickier than you think!

First, consider travelling alone. Depending on you and your destination, this is certainly a viable, and perhaps the best, option for many. Flying solo can be a wonderful taste of freedom and the perfect opportunity to be selfish in making your own decisions. It can also be a taste of loneliness for some.

Travelling with other people can be like being married to them. You spend a ton of time together, you make decisions together that affect each of you, you pool money and food, you compromise, you laugh together, you cry together, and you experience each others every mood. Could you marry just anyone? Doubtful. You probably can't travel with just anyone either. The decision may not be quite so critical as that and the consequences aren't life long, but do consider certain compatibility factors before choosing your travel mate.

Consider what you and your prospective travel mate each want to get out of your trip. Do you want to jet around and max out on the number of countries you step foot in or would you rather give yourself more time in a smaller number of areas, time to sink in and experience the culture? Do you see yourself cruising cities or wandering country sides? Are you attracted to the same locales and cultures? Are you of similar independence levels? Are you willing to spend time alone or time together? Are you compatible in terms of your risk-taking tendencies? Do you want to move at the same speeds schedule-wise? What activities do each of you see yourself doing on a day to day basis - visiting churches and museums, kayaking class IV rapids, or a bit of both? Are you looking to hook up with other travellers or do you prefer keeping to yourselves? Do you have similar standards in accommodation and transportation? Can you afford the same amount of travel time? Perhaps one of the most important questions that may even go without saying is your budget - do you have similar ideas on how much money to spend on what types of things?

Then ask yourselves what the trade off is between the benefits of travelling with this person and the compromises you may be making.

Compromise is an important social and teamwork skill and there is nothing wrong with exercising it, however think about just how valiant and altruistic you want to be. You may not want to go 'halfsies' on the trip of a lifetime that you have been saving for for years. Having said that, not everything has to be perfectly compatible or compromisable. Successful travel mates can separate for hours, days or even weeks at a time. If you think you and your travel partner(s) may have compatibility issues make sure that each of you are prepared (both mentally and gearwise) to spend some time independently.

Finally, consider the number of people you want in your travelling circus. One is good. So is two. A third can offset friction between two but can often be the so-called third wheel, especially when it comes to beds in a room and seats on a bus. A fourth can solve that problem, but the more people may not be the merrier when it comes to making decisions and travel plans. Remember though, having travel mates can cut accommodation and perhaps touring and transportation costs. Groups are also easy to break up into subsets to enjoy different activities and adventures.

Once you have decided to travel with someone, be prepared to get to know every little thing about them. If you decide to fly solo, you will have plenty of time and opportunity to meet compatible travellers along the way. Keep an open mind to your fellow wanderers - it is up to each of you whether you spend hours or months together.

Back to top